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The freaking Doomslayer can’t punch under water? What kind of bullshit isthis shit?

Oh, this isn’t going to be a fight at all. Well, it’s Doom; it’s always a fight.

Let’s make this personal!

Oh good. I’ve been saving this for you. Oh, you have a buddy.

I had one shot left in that cannon when I killed that second one. Haha!

And my parents were worried about Mortal Kombat.

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Mongols just standing there minding their business, then I came in and fucked up their Christmas...hey, that rhymes!

(sees red enemy outline around dogs) Are you going to make me kill dogs? Dammit. I’m going to try to kill everyone but dogs. (Did he? Did he? I’ll let you speculate on that!)

(Fighting a Mongol boss) I don’t speak douchbag, sorry.

Sorry about the mess! Most of that was the Mongols!

(grabbing supplies and steel from peasants before riding out of town.) Grabbing supplies! These are, um, Mongol supplies!

(an enemy starts shooting at him while he’s fighting another) No! No arrow shit!

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Bugs and glitches in Microsoft Flight Simulator. (spoiler: it uses procedural generation to fill in some things, leading to various monuments looking like office blocks, and errors in sources lead to other things, like a 212-floor office tower in Melbourne...)
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[climbs house, runs around roof, jumps off roof] Surprise samurai!!! Damn, nobody’s here.

(You can have Jin, the PC, disrobe, climb into a hot spring and muse on one of a few topics that are presented to you. Yes you get to see samurai butt. We both admired the samurai butt this session because we managed to hit the hot spring at the Golden Hour when the sun was setting and bathing the scene, and the butt, in a warm glow.)

Ooh, steel, sweet! Sorry lady, I know you wanna get off this ship and everything but samurai-in’ ain’t cheap.

opening a chest while looting a ship Cool. This job has paid for itself.

considering what to do next You know, that’s going to be a slog. Just a lot of Mongol-killin’.

enters house Good afternoon, I’m not taking off my sandals because you haven’t taken yours off, either.

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(Another Organization XIII member shows up and starts monologuing) Where’s my button for Solve This With Violence?

You guys are standing there gawping. Someone go up and smack her.
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Someone discovered a body. And it was that guy. And the body was me.

No alarm. I can keep killing Nazis. It’s a leisure time activity.

I love that you can steal their donuts.

Now I have a laser cannon, ho ho ho.

Whoa, they did upgrade their weapons! Nice job, guys!

Bye! (evil laugh)
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They sent me down to take care of a guy because they thought he might be a
problem and he wasn’t a problem because I believe in overkill.

I get another hatchet now because I killed enough people with them. That’s
the way life works.

Don’t turn around don’t turn around don’t fucking turn around. I just want
to kill you, dude.

(Re: an upgrade) I get faster when walking while crouching. I don’t know
how that is compared to walking, but I like walking in a crouch. It’s leg
day today.
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After the GIANT VIDEO GAME LIST from the previous entry, I found Wikipedia's list of video game franchises, which was significantly shorter, and ran it through the neural network.

Read more... )

And again!

Sep. 15th, 2018 07:56 pm
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I found a pastebin where someone with the help of a subreddit is trying to compose a giant list of every video game ever.

You know I had to.

Video games via neural network )

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