welcome to camp telophase

rachelmanija has been reviewing Kindle excerpts of YA dystopia novels and in her most recent post, she complained

I am particularly done with the "[blank] has been banned" and "the government controls [blank]" dystopias. They're starting to seem like they were created by online dystopia generators. Here, have a few ideas, make a mint:

Vibrate: Sex has been banned and the government controls masturbation.

Go: Travel has been banned and the government controls pets.

Ouch: Sickness has been banned and the government controls pain.

Sweat: Sports have been banned and the government controls water.

Oh, like you didn't see it coming.

Needs input! There are only a very few in there because I'm at work and didn't want to put more than ten minutes into it! What I need:
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