Dear Library Science Graduate Student From Another University Who I have Never Met;

You left a message on my work voicemail a day or two after I left for Foreign Parts saying that you'd noticed I was the I.T. Librarian and in charge of the library website at my university and that you had a project for your class and as part of this project you were required to create a Voki. And that you had no idea what that was and was hoping that I'd be able to tell you.

The reason I am not returning your phone call is not that it's been almost two weeks since you left the voicemail and your assignment is most likely already finished and turned in. It is that you are a GRADUATE STUDENT in LIBRARY SCIENCE and it didn't occur to you that there are two significantly more useful resources to consult about your question than a total stranger you found on the internets, to whit:

A) The professor who gave you the assignment

and

B) G O O G L E

Please note that until five minutes ago, I had no idea what a Voki was, either, and yet I managed to answer my own reference question almost instantaneously. I did not need to spend valuable time that I could instead spend typing snarky letters on the intartubes idly poking about other universities' websites and telephoning their webmasters to ask the question.

I hope that your area of specialization is not Reference, as you obviously need to take a few more classes on the subject before you are ready to be unleashed upon the unsuspecting populace.

No love,
telophase

Dear Design Star Contestant:

"Functionable" is not a word.

Thank you,

telophase

I can't wait to use this on the next person who fails to Google a simple concept...

http://letmegooglethatforyou.com/?q=artist+alley+guide

GAH finally managed to get my hard drive backed up so I could install updates. WinXP had an update out that apparently on some machines broke XP so bad you had to reinstall from the start, much like what happened a few months ago with my Vista laptop, so I elected to flirt with danger and not update until I'd gotten ALL MY ART backed up. WHereupon I found that someone who I'm not naming but whose name rhymes with myrialux had managed to pack all my cables in one box, separately from their components for some inexplicable reason that not even he can explain now for the move, which resulted in a lot of interesting language as I set up various electronic things in my apartment and had to deduce which cable when with what. Anyway, the upshot is that the AC adapter for my MyBook backup thingybopper went missing, and I had to order a new one.

But it's all backed up now and, as I expected, a newer patch or update fixed the problem with the broken update, and there seem to have been absolutely no problems. So far.

But all that's beside the point. So today, in addition to the forgettable book (Elfshadow), I also finished The Halfling's Gem book 3 of the Icewind Dale Trilogy. ( Read more... )

...why I will not be hiring the host of Destination: Truth on the SciFi Channel to go on any scientific expeditions for me:

1) (when in the Gobi desert seeking giant acid-spitting worms, after they found a dinosaur fossil): "We took a sample of the fossil to see if we could get DNA out of the organic matter."

2) (when in the Australian rainforest seeking the Yowie, and finding a tree with severly scratched bark): "We took a sample of the bark to see if we could find any organic matter."


(All quotes paraphrased.)

I applied the universal Mary-Sue Litmus Test to Drizzt Do'Urden...

( Read more... )

ETA: Starting to apply the test to manga/anime characters in the comments. So far I predict that the standard shounen heroes will all be Stus, because that seems to be a prerequisite for that sort of character. OTOH, Gary Stu and Mary Sue characters tend to appeal directly to the target demographic of 14-year-old boys and girls (the age at which most of you confess to voraciously reading Forgotten Realms novels XD), so there's really no surprise in that.

I have now finished Sojourn, the third book in the Drizzzzzt origin trilogy, and I have a confession to make...

( Read more... )

...in the continuing RPG tie-in novel saga. I'm going to be doing art for the rest of the evening instead of reading this book and thinking about all the skeevy gender and racial politics in the series, but I thought I'd let this part of the book speak for itself:

( Read more... )

More random rambling on my recent RPG reading. Part the first, for context.

( CORONATED is NOT A WORD! )

The Crystal Shard by R. A. Salvatore, published by TSR in 1988, p. 44

In this place [the dwarf Bruenor] found his dreams, and ever they took him back to his ancient home. Mithril Hall, home of his fathers and their's [sic] before them, where rivers of the shining metal ran rich and deep and the hammers of dwarven smiths rang out in praise to Moradin and Dumathoin. Bruenor was merely an unbearded boy when his people had delved too deep into the bowels of the world and had been driven out by the dark things in dark holes. He was now the eldest surviving member of his small clan and the only one among them who had witnessed the treasures of Mithril Hall.

Dude! You forgot "Drums! Drums in the deep!"

I know that D&D and the whole heroic-fantasy RPG movement started in large part as a desire to play in Tolkien's world, but you think they'd file the serial numbers off a little more thoroughly.

(Not a complaint against Salvatore in this particular post, as he's forced to adhere to the worldbuilding, setting, and characters created by the company as a tie-in writer, just to the concept as a whole.)