(no subject)

[telophase]

A nice guide to recognizing when someone's in an uncomfortable situation and how to offer them the chance of rescue.

ETA: And how to prepare yourself to keep from freezing up in a situation. From the comments on the Open Source Women Backing Each Other Up Program post.

Comments

[bitpig.livejournal.com]

This whole thing is dumb. Sure, some chicks don't care if a stranger feels them up, but that is beside the point. Civilized people simply do not touch one another in public, and certainly not for the sake of a mere thrill. No real man would feel up a woman in public, Open Source or not. (Believe me, I've had offers, but, geez, I'm old and married and, well, it's just rude.

Likewise, no real man would stand idly by and let some young lady be groped in public. If the young lady is "open source", I'd politely ask her and him to take it somewhere else; if it's an obviously unwelcomed groping, I'm afraid I'd probably just pop the sonofabitch on the back of the head for a quick KO and let con security or the cops clean up the mess.

Civilized gentlemen do not mistreat young women, nor do they tolerate the mistreatment of women. I flatter myself that I am a gentleman, and am raising the lad to be one as well.

[arkanefyre.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the links. I enjoyed reading them, and learned something new.

Also, I really liked bansheewall's Never Get Raped. (http://bansheewail.livejournal.com/13967.html)

[theidolhands.livejournal.com]

I agree with arkanefyre, but we perhaps we also need a guide to the proper way to approach a woman (or person you are attracted to). I've known guys for over 15 years who NEVER asked a woman on a date - talked to her, stalked her, acted an idiot when she was around but "Would you like to get a cup of coffee?" No. It's absurd. Simply talk to someone to find out if they would actually like to be even in a relationship instead of acting creepy.

Also...why are so many people (I'm going to stay gender neutral) BLIND to body language. Short responses, curling of the lip, leaning away...they aren't interested, take a hint.

I have another VERY important suggestion for a common dilemma I see. Trying to get people out of your sphere or legue and being frustrated or miffed that you have no one. Ok...if you are a much older person looking to get a younger one, or not especially attractive trying to get FAR more attractive flesh (hey, you're being shallow, why can't they be?) then here's my suggestion; you need ONE of at least THREE things:

1. Money, enough to pamper another person
2. Looks, worthy of model or actor

If you do not have either of these, then you at least need 3. independence. That is you can support yourself and drive your own wheels even if they aren't great. IF you are a very full grown adult living at your mama's place with a whoop-dee then you need to work on these three things before you get to puttin' it out there and/or stalking people. Yeah, that's my little reality check.

Ladies, get better at saying, "Get lost, loser." And one good piece of advice I got was, in a dangerous situation, was to announce "I don't know this person!" because otherwise if you are being accosted, folks may think you're in a relationship having a rough moment and will mind their own business. Stupid, but that's how crowds work. Even if no one does anything, you get a witness situation.