He blinked at the boy. "Uh, is he really coming with us?" he said. "Are you sure about this, god-man?"
"God?" The boy blinked.
"We'll get to that later," the stranger told the boy. He turned back to him. "Yes, he is coming with us."
He thrust his hands into the depths of his trenchcoat and hunching his shoulders moodily. "What do you need him for? You asked _me_ first. Have you decided that I'm not good enough?" He stared down at the bead on its chain, lying over his heart. "I mean, I know I'm not good enough, but-"
"You really, really, really need some candy," the boy said to him. He looked up at the stranger. "Can we go get some get some candy? Or - hey! I know this really great place that does all-night-"
The stranger abruptly leaped onto a bar stool, balancing high above the crowd with his arms thrown out. "FOR THE LOVE OF HOT NAKED BUTTSEX!" he shouted, in a sudden, strange pause in the music. "I NEED A DECENT CONVERSATIONALIST, NOW!"
The crowd stared up at him.
"Bollocks," said the stranger, leaping down again in a flare of leather. "I was hoping the third one would be here too. Come on you two."
"Where are we going?" he asked dazedly, as he and the boy were swept up in the stranger's wake.
The stranger paused in the doorway, staring out into the night. "Which do you think has the best chance of having a decent internet connection: a monastry, a nunnery, a seraglio, a Turkish bath, a ship, or a hotel with only one room left?"
He and the boy stared at the stranger, then at each other.
"Er.." said the boy, "the hotel?"
"Then that," the stranger said, "is where we're going. I have an urgent need to consult the Mystery Science Theatre message board." He led the three of them down the-
Three of them?
He stared up at the third man. Six foot six of hulking, scarred, pony-tailed muscle in a black leather trench stared back.
"Wow," said the kid, weakly. "Now that's a _tall_ drink of water. Hi!"
The man transferred his flat, expressionless gaze to the kid, whose smile started to wilt like a sunflower in an atomic blast.
He grabbed the stranger's sleeve, forcing him to stop. "God-man, _who the hell is that?!_"
"Ah," the stranger said, peering through his sunglasses without surprise at the human wall following them. "That would be my silent, brooding ex-supersoldier."
"Where did he _come_ from?"
The stranger shrugged. "You shouldn't ask these things of supersoldiers. It generally takes around three plot-arcs to find out, and the answers are always nasty. He's coming with us, anyway. He was the first one of you I found."
"Wait." He blinked. "You found _me_ first."
The stranger shook his head.
"But I didn't even _see_ Mr Tall Dark and Brooding!"
"Yes," the stranger said patiently. "He's _good_."
Part 3
"God?" The boy blinked.
"We'll get to that later," the stranger told the boy. He turned back to him. "Yes, he is coming with us."
He thrust his hands into the depths of his trenchcoat and hunching his shoulders moodily. "What do you need him for? You asked _me_ first. Have you decided that I'm not good enough?" He stared down at the bead on its chain, lying over his heart. "I mean, I know I'm not good enough, but-"
"You really, really, really need some candy," the boy said to him. He looked up at the stranger. "Can we go get some get some candy? Or - hey! I know this really great place that does all-night-"
The stranger abruptly leaped onto a bar stool, balancing high above the crowd with his arms thrown out. "FOR THE LOVE OF HOT NAKED BUTTSEX!" he shouted, in a sudden, strange pause in the music. "I NEED A DECENT CONVERSATIONALIST, NOW!"
The crowd stared up at him.
"Bollocks," said the stranger, leaping down again in a flare of leather. "I was hoping the third one would be here too. Come on you two."
"Where are we going?" he asked dazedly, as he and the boy were swept up in the stranger's wake.
The stranger paused in the doorway, staring out into the night. "Which do you think has the best chance of having a decent internet connection: a monastry, a nunnery, a seraglio, a Turkish bath, a ship, or a hotel with only one room left?"
He and the boy stared at the stranger, then at each other.
"Er.." said the boy, "the hotel?"
"Then that," the stranger said, "is where we're going. I have an urgent need to consult the Mystery Science Theatre message board." He led the three of them down the-
Three of them?
He stared up at the third man. Six foot six of hulking, scarred, pony-tailed muscle in a black leather trench stared back.
"Wow," said the kid, weakly. "Now that's a _tall_ drink of water. Hi!"
The man transferred his flat, expressionless gaze to the kid, whose smile started to wilt like a sunflower in an atomic blast.
He grabbed the stranger's sleeve, forcing him to stop. "God-man, _who the hell is that?!_"
"Ah," the stranger said, peering through his sunglasses without surprise at the human wall following them. "That would be my silent, brooding ex-supersoldier."
"Where did he _come_ from?"
The stranger shrugged. "You shouldn't ask these things of supersoldiers. It generally takes around three plot-arcs to find out, and the answers are always nasty. He's coming with us, anyway. He was the first one of you I found."
"Wait." He blinked. "You found _me_ first."
The stranger shook his head.
"But I didn't even _see_ Mr Tall Dark and Brooding!"
"Yes," the stranger said patiently. "He's _good_."